Difficult to Summarize a Broken Heart
It is difficult to summarize a broken heart, the journey of saying goodbye to someone who held your heart and who you never fully met.
3 years ago as I held the lifeless body of my son, beautiful and healthy in every way, but who never took his first breath, I knew life would never be the same again.
Our plans for the future of our family melted away, all at once and bit by bit over time. Yet in my brokenness, when I struggled to care for myself and my older children, when the fog I lived in seemed unending, God was there. He began showing up in big ways, reminding us of His presence, of His love. Teaching us He knows all too well our heartbreak, that He witnessed the death and burial of His own Son, that He really understood.
In the midst of our loss, the family of Hope Community Church stood on our behalf. In praying for us, helping plan and organize for a funeral, preparing food to feed our family for months afterward, giving help with childcare, with housework, bringing hugs and coffee and back scratches, in crying with us and being brave enough to ask how we were holding up, we were held up by the body of Christ when we couldn’t stand on our own two feet. We will forever be thankful for you, Hope, for reminding us through your actions that we were not alone, that God was providing for us and that He would see us through this dark valley.
We knew without a doubt, though our hearts ached, that we were loved.
When I was able to read Scripture again, the Lord directed me to passages of hope, of provision, of healing and of resurrection. I listened to sermons on God’s strength and mercy, His ability to work through our suffering to make us more like Jesus. The idea of Heaven changed from an abstract concept to a joyfilled reality. And over time, with the power of God’s Holy Spirit and the love of Christ at Hope Community Church, I began to experience the peace and healing that is only possible from God.
As I continue to journey down the path God has brought me to, I have to continually be reminded of His love, His control and that with Him we cannot be sunk. We can only be brought into deeper relationship with the anchor of our souls, given freely to us by our good Father through the loss of His Son on the cross.
Meg (and Mark) Hintz